Agree With Me or Else!

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logo of who deleted uYesterday I was discouraged by reading so many ideas that I disagree with on FB.  And as much as I didn’t want to become emotionally involved.  I did.  I got sucked in to issues like abortion, gay rights, the “attack” on christianity in this country,and the need for christian leaders to put God back in our government and policies.  I didn’t comment on most of the threads but rather silently stalked the arguments between others.  But I did choose to comment on one of them.  I commented for the very first time on the page owned by a former teacher of mine.  This is not a safe place for opposing comments.  Day after day she posts pictures and quotes that are offensive to someone in my position so yesterday I didn’t feel like being quiet.  It’s not fair that I’m asked to be silent because my views are offensive and misguided.  And while this woman has posted offensive things on my page I have never commented on hers.  I rarely ever comment on the pages of people with opposing views because I believe your page is your place and unless you are asking for input you simply want to state your view and have people agree with you.  I rarely have people agree with me and at times that is exhausting but what’s even more exhausting is the moment you challenge someone’s views (as I did yesterday in a very kind and mature manner) that person unfriends you rather than responds.  Yep, that’s the response I got for asking questions about defining what her understanding of her posted quote was.  I simply asked questions.  “How do you feel that religion is being attacked?  What does that look like?  So if those of us who are challenging religion are masking hate and intolerance as free thought you are okay with Muslims or other religions having the same freedom as Christians in this country?  That means a Muslim should be allowed public prayer in public institutions and they should be allowed to have their beliefs influence public policies. I see it as Christians want “tolerance” of their own religion but not all religions.  But maybe I’m missing something?”  Instead of offering a response I got the quick and easy click of a button….Unfriend. If I did that to every person who has disagreed with me or said offensive things to and about me or who simply has a different set of beliefs than me, well, there’s a good chance I’d be friendless.

I like the diversity of opinions that facebook offers.  I like being challenged.  I like having the freedom to post my thoughts.  I like the encouragement I receive in private from individuals who are still in hiding with their disbelief or questioning.  I like knowing that I can be the voice of reason for those who are afraid to speak up.  I like knowing that I have a voice.
But I hate feeling like I still need to hide part of myself.  I hate feeling that I’m not allowed to comment.  I hate feeling that if I say anything negative about christianity I’ll be labeled as hateful, as an attacker, as intolerant.  And no matter how strong of an effort I make to be civil and kind with my words I hate that it’s not enough.  I hate that no matter how lovely of a woman I am some are still unable to see past the fact that what I am fighting against may actually deserve the fight.  And through it all I still hate being unfriended.

silenced womanI’d like to say that unfriending in FB land doesn’t hurt but it does…just a smidge.  Just enough to feel like a small kick in the gut.  Because of my views, which many of you would like to silence, I have lost relationships with family and friends.  It’s been made clear that I’m entitled to my crazy views but I’m not entitled to talk about them or question yours.  Yet by some entitlement you are allowed free reign on what you are allowed to say to me.

What I’m slowly beginning to realize is that these people are part of my growth process.  I’ve grown from the numerous attacks masked as love.  I’ve learned that the masking love technique is not genuine and it borders on manipulation.
I’ve learned that when I don’t conform to what those family members and friends ask of me and when I can’t see life through their lense they run for the hills and then throw the blame at me for not having god in my life.

BubbleI was raised in a bubble of christianity and many of those people think that because they were owners of that bubble it gives them rights to my “soul” and my being.  It doesn’t!  That bubble burst long ago and is nothing more than a space of my past and one that I choose to move forward from. Your job as owner and facilitator of that bubble is finished.

I’ve learned that no matter how vastly different our world views are you do not deserve to be bullied or demeaned as a human being and neither do I!  But we all deserve to be challenged.  That is the only place that growth can arrive otherwise we will forever remain stagnant with arrogance and ego taking their ugly hold.

So while part of me sat discouraged and questioning why I choose to use my voice rather than sit silently like they’ve demanded I know that I must be true to myself and only myself.

Therefore today  I choose to keep moving forward.  To keep asking the questions.  To keep fighting for those who are oppressed. To keep being a voice of reason.

This is me.  Take it or leave it.  I promise not to take offense because today I’m just a little bit stronger.

Photo Credits:
Unfriend by elaw2k4 on photobucket
Living in Bubbly by lady_j_925 on photobucket
Silenced Woman by furiataurina1010 on photobucket

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About ThinkingWithVitality

Wife, mama, wellness coach, certified vet tech, adoption and special needs advocate, Tucsonan turned Portlander finding her way in Texas, adventure seeker, wannabe vegetarian, freethinker, knowledge hunter, secular humanist. Love writing, distance running, cycling, hiking, photography, nature, essential oils, natural medicine, traveling, RVs and tents, reading, adventures, organizing, helping others, good beer, acoustic music and sadly the time sucking passion of pinterest.

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